Making Time to Make Time

Last weekend, I had my littlest sister, Hannah, come stay at my house. There's nothing like your youngest sibling creeping through puberty to make you feel older. If you have younger siblings, I'm sure you understand.

Hannah was born when I was a junior in high school and was an very unexpected addition to our family. I have to admit, it can be difficult having a sibling that is so much younger. All too easily, you get wrapped up in your daily routine. You know, gym, tanning, laundry? Yes, I'm kidding. Seriously, though, I think adults get a case of day to day "tunnel vision". It's when you can only seem to focus on the day to day schedule and rarely step outside that schedule to fit in anything else. Such has been the case with Hannah. The Man has the same problem. Having two brothers 18 and 20 years younger himself, he knows all too well the struggle of remembering to set aside time for your much younger siblings. Unfortunately sometimes, it can be a seemingly unavoidable yet entirely inexcusable problem.

I remember the day that my step mom, Becky, suspected she might be pregnant. Of course, she did what any woman worried about pregnancy would do. She asked me, her 17 year old step daughter to the store to buy the pregnancy test for her. No, I'm not joking, and yes, yes she did. Looking back, I think she was too emotional and maybe even a little embarrassed at the time, but I tell you what, being an adult now I cannot fathom asking a 17 year old to go buy a pregnancy test for me. Oh and did I mention we lived in a small town? A very small town. An 8,000 people, Midwest, conservative, farming, small town. Of course, I went to school with the guy who was working at the store where I ended up buying the test, and I, naturally, had to defend myself. "It's not for me!" and "I'm buying this for someone else!" I swear, to this day, I don't think the guy believed me, that is, until he saw the pregnant proof in Becky's expanding belly.

I've made a sort of resolution with myself to spend more time with my sister. Hannah will be 12 in April. What scares me is that she's starting to look less and less like a little girl every time I see her. In some ways, I feel like I missed out on those little girl years. I wasn't really around much, especially early on. The more that I think about it now, it's probably just as important to take a active role in her life from now on. She needs a good role model at this age. Every kid does, and I'm making a point to try and be one, so I can be there to give her the guidance that I tried so hard to find when I was a kid.

I'll admit, sometimes it seems like a daunting task and that, in turn, makes me feel sort of guilty. I just need to stick to my guns and put in the extra effort. I mean honestly, if I can spend countless hours in front of my computer, I can make time for my sister. Then again, where does that leave us? I just have to remember that kids have got it rough these days. Not that we didn't, but it just seems their innocence gets stripped away earlier and earlier. They are bombarded with images and ideas, both good and bad, from an early age, leaving a million avenues for them to choose from, and I've made it my job to make sure she chooses wisely.